Let Wood Be Wood — And Stop Ruining It With Paint

As a master woodworker who has made, sanded, and polished hundreds of pieces of wood furniture, one of my strongest opinions has remained constant through the years: I don't like painting wooden furniture. Yes, I have heard all of the designer's rationales — "I want to dematerialize this," or "I need to invoke that" — but I don't buy any of it. No, what you need to do is stop painting wood. Trust me on this, you will feel better. Y'all are just wrong. 

I don't know if painting wooden furniture is a mortal or venial sin, but let's face it — God made wood, people made paint. It shows. And for love of all that is good and holy, stop ruining your wooden furniture with paint. There is no need. There is virtually no limit to the variety, hue, and texture presented by wood grain. Its scope stretches from a textured white tone to warm hues like red, brown, purple, yellow, gold, jet black, with each possibility offering variations and subtleties. A divine pallet, indeed. How unimaginative does a designer have to be to cover that potential glory with a layer of uniform blandness? Consider unfinished Douglas fir, where it can provide a look and texture evocative of a desert landscape at sunset, or a highly polished ebony example that mimics the darkest starlit night. What possible good can come of hiding that beauty in a coat of soul-killing latex enamel? 

So yes, I'm going to deconstruct the "paint it" arguments here. I'm going to make my case. And for the love of all things wood, I hope my points leave you convinced to put those paint cans back in storage.

As a woodworker, nothing burns me like the common HGTV refrain of "Let's go with a cool gray color scheme." As a member of the do-it-yourself media industrial complex, I admit that I personally have much to atone for. But among the darkest corners of our DIY world is the television fix-it-up genre: I believe the people involved are goodhearted souls, but they have all been led astray... and probably by Sherwin-Williams.

Why do we want to live in rooms devoid of color and life? Bland is boring, and the answer to a foggy gray miasma is, if you ask me, to embrace the natural beauty of wood instead of covering it with ... well, more gray. A curly bubinga coffee table can add glorious color and style to a room.  A lamp turned from box elder wood burl is an accent that brings the intricacies of the natural world inside to where we live.

Here is a thought experiment: You are in an antiques store and as you walk the floor, there are two toddler's highchairs. One is white with vinyl covered cushions. The other is light-colored wood with an aged patina, and the back has a much-worn image of a cute little lamb. Which of those pieces evokes an emotional response? And while that contrast is obviously contrived, my experience has shown me that furniture with natural grain delivers a much greater positive emotional response. You will see people running their fingers gently over a highly figured wooden tabletop. Admiring the beauty that nature has created. Paint it? At that point it might as well be plastic. 

Now, I know that sometimes furniture is just an expedience — a functional requirement in a busy life. You can make anything in the world out of plastic, and it can be very affordable ... but like a vampire, do you want to invite it into your home? Wooden furniture not only has all the benefits I've mentioned but is environmentally sustainable. It is a renewable resource. It stores carbon, and its production is largely free of environmentally harmful chemicals. And if it's well-made, it is extremely durable. Tables and chairs that are scores of decades old are still used as everyday furniture. All that carbon locked up in the wood's fibers will never add to our CO2 burden. In contrast, while paints made today are much more environmentally sound than in the past, they still release volatile organic compounds (VOC). Paint that wood table and you further the oppression of "big paint." 

Even a plain-Jane species like birch and red oak has rich color-saturated patinas that speak of life and the beauty of nature, rather than the pollution of the petroleum industry. I am not saying we need to bring back wainscotting and wall-to-wall wood paneling, but I am saying that we should let wooden furniture be free of its polymerized, pollution-packed pigmented prison. 

With the photo above as exhibit A, I will explain to you how keeping furniture free of paint came to be my mission. In the days of my youth there was a popular trend — very much in the upcycling spirit we see today — where DIYers took old but otherwise sound furniture, and applied a combination of paints in a technique that they called "antiquing." 

My mother, a woman with the energy level of a toddler and a deep well of confidence, took to this trend with gusto. One might say there was even a time when none of us kids felt comfortable sitting in one place too long lest we be antiqued, as well.

As seen in the above photo, I still have in my home one of those pieces of my mother's "antiqued" painted furniture. It is a type of desk called a secretary, with a single front drawer, original hardware, and a fold-down front that becomes a writing surface, with smaller drawers and cubbies inside for storage. It is made of solid mahogany, with cabriole legs and a scrolled apron in the front. It is a good quality, well-made piece ... and in its original state, with a clear finish on the mahogany, it was a classic in every detail. Unfortunately, Mom's passion for antiquing got the better of her, and she applied a medium green base coat with black streaks to invoke the impression of an antique. To this day, I think it is hideous. To add to my emotional pain, my wife loves it and will not let me touch it. Preventing this sort of furniture defacement is the source of my mission to keep paint away from wood.

William Morris, who spearheaded the British arts and crafts movement, believed that creating a warm and beautiful physical environment in the home was essential to happiness. As he famously said, "Have nothing in your home that you do not know to be useful or believe to be beautiful." His classic Morris Chair, amid his other furniture designs, were an attempt on his part to better life for mankind. Wood furniture, when made in a manner that's true to its origins, has a surprisingly powerful history.

And that is my point here. Wood is a part of the Earth. It's real, genuine, and true to itself, while already being blessed with a beautiful array of textures, designs, and colors. As a woodworker, I'm pleading with you: Bring that natural beauty — nature itself — into your home, and let it be nature. Separate yourself from the HGTV mantra of dull, plastic-looking monotones. Don't "antique" anything. Embrace this material for what it is. Let the heart of history in each wood pattern be seen and embraced. Let wood be wood! You'll be happier ... and I'll definitely be happier, too, since you won't be asking me to paint wood furniture anymore.